JSA Headliners

• "Tes mains de jeu sont tres forts - spitting game with Sarah"
• "Ew! My underwear is damp! (a tale of nerd camp eviction that will both shock and amuse you)"
• "Spitt v. Swallow, the ground-breaking case we were afraid to talk about... until now"
• "JSA rebels show you how to jaywalk like a pro"
• "Defining characteristics of Jewish players and how to avoid them"
• "'Hey, you don't look dirty today!': Lessons in tact from Jane Mei"
• "New uses for lobster tails: appalling news from the Wangsta"
• "50 Cent or Half Dolla? You decide which moniker gives this hardcore rapper more street cred"
• "The woes of parking meters: one student petitions for the removal of these unwieldy weapons"
• "Breaking the bank: A big spender forsakes materialism for humanitarian causes"
• "The bushy squirrel punishment dance and the life one ridiculous mane of hair breathed into it"
• "A Walk in the Clouds: a swimmer romances his classmates with innovative wooing techniques"
• follow-up article: "To deliberate perturbance of women as an effective means to get in their pants? What experts have to say."
• "Sexual tension: One RA speaks out"
• "The Man keeping you down? How getting written up has gotten out of control"
• "An exclusive interview with Sarah Wang: Find out what's really in her head (or not)"
• "Future dictator caught in the act of bra-stealing: Is Connie girlier that you think?"
• "How 'bout them apples! Why fruit harvesting is fun"
• "It's gettin' hot in herre... Backstreet Boy backup dancer accosted by phat cheerleader"
• "'But my heart flutters when I dance with him!' How JSA goggles turned Yale-boy into a hot commodity"
• "'I'm gonna burn in hell for this!': How one shopping trip sealed this bearded bad boy's fate"
• "So he walks like he's just had sex: The truth about one boy's PG past"
• "When calves were sexy: How changing images of sensuality hurt one RA"
• "'Can you help me with my studying?' The slow seduction of an innocent girl and what you can do to stop it"
• "The allure of silk boxers: One metro opens up"
• "Professor repeatedly late to class as result of 'fit fiancee' and grilled-cheese cooking"
• "Why cloud watching is in such high demand: One brave girl goes undercover Explo only to discover that it really means spooning in the grass"
• "'My name is Francesca, but you can call me Miss Wahl if you're nasty': The sexy moments you miss when no one's looking"
• "Refugee babies projected to knock out Brazilians as hottest source for Victoria's Secret supermodels"
• "Perspectives: 'Sunshine on my window makes me happy; Hopscotch on my window makes me want to choke a b****': An angry white woman vents"
• "'Hey, them's fightin' words!': How an MIA sex life creates tension among roommates"
• "Trend Alert: bang-straightening is back with a vengeance"
• "'But I thought Jews believed in monogamy!' How one man lost his religion and gained a harem"
• "Girl continually posts unflattering photos of people on internet: artist or voyeur?"

(Sydney)

(Disclaimer: Any offensive phrases used that failed to produce a positive - and by positive I mean laugh-inducing - reaction in the reader have been apologized for. Sorry for any lack of humor on my part: It was late and I was tired.)